A weekend in Chettinad
"You are looking for a girl?", she asked. I said, "Sorry?". "Are you looking for a bride?", she said. I was in Kanadukathan village in Tamil Nadu state in southern India.
I was travelling from Trichy to Karaikudi. I was planning to visit the area called Chettinad. The villages in Chettinad were full of mansions, called periya veedhu in Tamil, that were built in the 1700's and 1800's. They were built by rich traders with the finest material available in the world at that time. Their businesses flourished until the arrival of the British. They went into decay when the British imposed harsh taxes on Indians and introduced laws favouring European businesses. Most of the traders in Chettinad migrated to Singapore, a mecca for traders, and are currently multi-millionaires there. I was travelling to explore the Chettinad mansions that they left behind.
I was in a bus from Trichy to Karaikudi and wanted to catch a connection to go to Kanadukathan village. I asked the man wearing a dhoti (a type of sarong worn around the waist), seated next to me, "Where should I get off to get a bus to Kanadukathan?". "Why are you going there?", he asked. I said, "I am just travelling". "Do you have work with the panchayat (village government)?", he asked. I said, "No. I have come to see the Chettinad mansions". The man had never heard of the mansions. I asked the ticket conductor, "Can you tell me where I should get off to go to Kanadukathan village?". She said, "Where are you from?". "Bangalore", I replied. She told the bus driver in Tamil, "We have one more here". I asked her in Tamil, "What do you mean?". She replied, "Nothing. I will tell you where to get off".
I was checking into my hotel in Kanadukathan village and asked the hotel receptionist, Sheela, about the Chettinad mansions. She took out a sheet of paper and neatly drew out a map for me. Sheela then said, "Are you looking for a girl?". I said, "Sorry?". "Are you looking for a bride?", she asked. Young, unmarried women are often referred to as girls in India. I said, "No. I am not looking for a bride. Why did you ask me that?". Sheela said, "None of the girls in Chettinad want to stay in Chettinad. They want to go to Bangalore. They want to get married to someone in Bangalore". "We get men from Bangalore frequently, looking for marriage", she said. Sheela then asked, "Are you married?". I lied to her. I said, "Yes". "Why are then here alone?", Sheela asked. I said, "I have come to see the mansions". She stared at me, unconvinced, and said, "Most people who come to see the mansions are foreigners".
The village was completely deserted. There was no traffic and there were no pedestrians on the roads. I wandered around and saw a couple of mansions. I then walked into a restaurant set in a grand Chettinad mansion. The ceiling must have been 40 or 50 feet high. The wooden columns were made of Burmese teak. The flooring was Italian marble. The stained-glass windows were French. The ceiling was covered with Spanish tiles. The mirrors were from Belgium. In the restaurant there was a large European tour group and they were talking in either German or Swedish. I can't differentiate between the two.
An old man wearing a dhoti was my waiter. He asked, "Where are you from?". I said, "Bangalore". He asked, "Do you know Tamil?". I said, "Yes". That made him happy. He then proceeded to speak to me in Tamil. "Do you want to try some Chettinad food?", he asked, "Will you have uthappam (onion encrusted lentil pancake)?". I said, "Yes, I like uthappam". "Do you eat meat?", he asked. I said, "Yes". He was very happy. "Most people who come from Bangalore speak in Hindi and are vegetarian", he said. "I will get you spicy Chettinad chicken with the uthappam", he said. "There is not even one vegetarian in the whole of Chettinad", he declared.
"So, you have come to look for a girl", the old man said. I said, "No. I have come to see the mansions". He dismissed my reply and said, "You are from Bangalore. You eat meat. You are perfect for a Chettinad girl". "There is a WhatsApp group. I will post your photo. You will get matrimonial alliances within a few minutes", he said. I repeated, "I haven't come to look for a bride". "What's your phone number?", he demanded. I refused to give him my phone number. I had ordered a popular Indian beer, Kingfisher, with my meal. The old man said, "Do you want to drink the beer the way we drink it in Chettinad?". The old man brought a bottle of locally distilled Pudukkottai rum and said, "One peg of this is equal to seven pegs of Bacardi, which the Europeans are drinking!". He poured the rum into my beer. I paid the bill with cash since I didn't want him to know my name. I then staggered back to my hotel from the restaurant and went to sleep.
I was having breakfast in the hotel the next day and Sheela asked, "Where are you off to today?". I said, "Athangudi village". As she was drawing a map of Athangudi, she said, "There are three girls in Athangudi. Are you going there to see them?". I said, "No. I am not going to Athangudi to see any girl". She smiled and didn't say anything. Athangudi village, in addition to the Chettinad mansions, is known for hand-made tile making. The artisans have been producing these tiles for the last 500 years. I walked into a workshop and asked the tile maker, "Can you make one tile for me?". He asked me to select a pattern. I chose a green tile with a yellow flower on it. He produced the tile, in front of me, without the use of any machines. He kept the tile in the sun and said, "You will have to wait for about one hour for the paint to dry".
While I was waiting, the tile maker gave me a cup of south Indian filter coffee and asked, "Where are you from?". "Bangalore", I said. He asked, "Where are you going from Athangudi?". I said, "I am going to Kottaiyur village". "There are two girls in Kottaiyur", he said, "I can set up the meeting". I said, "No. I am not looking for a girl". "I can arrange a very nice dowry", he said. I said, "Thanks. I am just going there to see the mansions". "My commission on the dowry is just 10%. What's your phone number?", he asked. I left with the tile. I came back to my hotel after visiting Kottaiyur and Sheela asked me, "Did you see the three girls?". I said, "No. I told you that I am married". "Oh. You didn't like them", she said.
I was checking out of the hotel the next day and Sheela asked me, "Where are you off to now?". I said, "I am leaving Chettinad. I am going to Trichy". She said, "Do you need a taxi? I can book one for you". I said, "No". "How will you go then?", she asked. "I will take a bus to Karaikudi and then change and get another bus to Trichy", I said. She said, "You can take the train at 10am. It's direct". It was a two-hour journey to Trichy. In most places in India, to reach a railway station, you can walk out of your hotel and get an auto-rickshaw (tuktuk). But that was not possible in Kanadukathan, where there was absolutely no traffic. So, Sheela booked an auto-rickshaw for me. She booked it for 9:15am.
It was almost 9:40am and the auto-rickshaw did not turn up. Sheela said, "Come. I will drop you to the station on my scooter". I got on to her scooter and we reached the station. She said, "Go in and check if there is anyone selling the tickets". I walked into the station and I was the only person in the entire station. I bought a ticket to Trichy at the counter for ₹20 (27¢). I came out and was about to say thanks to Sheela, when she said, "I don't think you are married". I said, "Why?". "Married people don't travel in an unreserved second-class train", she said. "How do they travel?", I asked. "They would have booked an air-conditioned taxi", she said and sped off.
Have you ever been asked if you are married or unmarried, while travelling? If so, where?
Comments please! Thou shalt get a reply!
Copyright © 2020 by Shyam Kodavarthi. All rights reserved.
Nicely narrated. ENJOYED.....People Did ask me if I am married even during my days in school final years as my buildup was big and never considered me child. Revers of you Shyam.
ReplyDeleteThanks for reading and your comments on your experience.
DeleteOh , you seem to have met marriage dealers whose main focus is on that 10 percent margin . I really feel sad for those girls . I had heard that European men go to Philippines to get married to young Filipino girls. As you are widely travelled , you can share some similarities that you get to see in different countries . To answer to your question , I wear my toe rings and mangala sutra ,so nobody has ever asked me if I am married. Feel so safe 😃😀
ReplyDeleteThanks for reading. Abroad I have very rarely been asked why I travel alone or if I am married. Nobody seems to care. But in India it's the first two questions that I encounter.
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